Guacamole Salad

Salad:

Romaine lettuce

Iceberg Lettuce

Tomatoes

Cucumber

Mango

Avocado (what didn't go in the dressing)

Sauce:

(1/3) Avocado

Mango

Lime

Cilantro

(1/2) tomato 

Nothing special

Breakfast:(1/2) smoothie made from 6 large bananas, 10 dates, 1 apple, 1 pear

Lunch: rest of the smoothie

Snack: smuggled some raisins and 1 dried apricot from sprouts

            Small piece of papaya

Dinner: 3 cups of grapes, 1 large banana, 1 large green apple, 1 pear, 5 dried figs, 6 dates

Exercise: 10 miles

            45 min of basic hatha yoga

            15 min strength training.

I am not going to lie; today was a pretty hard day emotionally. I have no idea but for some reason I kept obsessing about my appearance and how I wasn't skinny enough. I feel fat and I feel like I look bloated. The other day a guy randomly told me I was skinny and I felt good. However, today I just woke up in a funk. My acne is coming back which makes no sense to me because I haven’t been eating a lot of fat. Anyway, it was just another typical grocery store day. I went to the internship site and am not here at home sitting in front of the computer. I really need to start meditation and repeating the mantra, “I am wise, I am kind, I am strong, I am beautiful” hopefully it will help cure any negativity.

I came up with this random list that runners say….enjoy

I need water
I’m carbing up
don't you hate people with strollers
It’s too cold to run
Its too hot to run
If you’re not sweaty, you didn't push it
I hate hills
I love carbs
where are my shorts?
Are these pants clean? (Sniffs pants)
Which running shoes did I wear yesterday?
Socks?
Aww, my nipples hurt! So tender and sore!
I NEED Neosporin!
My butt is sore
my calves; they are killing me
why can't there be any skinny jeans for my big calves?
Water belts look so dorky. (Later buys awater belt) Yeah, but I needed it. Don't judge.
*When someone passes you* show off! I bet he isn't even going fat.
Who runs in Nike? Lame!
MOVE people! Can’t you see I’m coming!
I really need to pee.
Get your own sidewalk
I only did an easy 10 miles today.
Pssssh, a 5K is nothing; I can do that in my sleep. Aw man, I'm drench today. Sweat is soo gross.

My knee. I hope I didn't ruin the good one.
My IT band is stretched out.
Man, I need an ice pack.
Where are my compression shorts?
Treadmills are for losers. Not a real run.
I hear coconut water is good for recovery.
When eating a lot:

Hey, I did good today
I’m carbing up.
I have endurance tomorrow
leave me alone, I’m hungry
 I’ll just run it off later
You just jealous cause you can't have any

Can you walk on my back
I hate hills
Hill runs are the worst, going down is actually harder
DANG! Beast mode!

Fasting?

For the first Friday of lent I did a mini fast, I did not eat anything upon waking and I had one meal at night time. I thought it wouldn't be suck a big deal because I could go a long time without eating, as I have done it before. To take my mind off of food I started the day with my normal five mile run, when I got home I drank lots of water. I was off to work. Thankfully we had just gotten new merchandise that needed to be put away so I was able to occupy my mind on something other than food and my grumbly tummy. Another fortunate event is that the food shop wasn't cooking anything very fragrant. I don't think I could stomach any strong smells, especially French fries. Even though I have not eaten a French fry in over two years, it is still the smells that always makes me hungry and crave them. I doubt I will touch them though. However, if I would have smelled food that day I think it would have gone one of two ways

1. I would get soo hungry and eat; even some questionable items might be consumed
2. It would make me nauseous because I had an empty stomach and therefore I would be sick and feel faint.

Thankfully none of the above occurred. However, around 3:30pm I started to feel the pains of hunger. It was kind of awful. It felt weird not being able to satisfy my body's need for food. Unfortunately, I had finished putting away all the merchandise at work and therefore had nothing to occupy because there wasn't any customers-it was a slow day. I couldn't concentrate on homework, it was pretty bad. I started to feel like a

zombie. Around 5pm, I was starved. I felt like I was living in a dark hole. I had no emotion, no feeling, I was getting irritated quiet easily. I didn’t want to talk to people, however I did not want to be alone, because alone was when I started to think about food and that was a bad thing.

Finally, it was time to go home, I raced home and looked into the fridge, and I ate oranges and apples till my stomach popped. I thought I was full, but I wasn't because, my stomach was soon asking for nutrients again. I ate banana chips (bad choice), raisins, apples, pears, dried apricots. I didn't properly combine my food; I was just acting on instinct. It was horrible. I felt like a disgusting creature that just thinks about food. I soon was able to stop eating; I ate the later portion of food in my room because I kind of felt guilty for eating. I soon went to sleep. 

The next day, I went on my usual Saturday five mile run in the morning. However, I felt the effects of not nurturing my body properly immediately. I ran slower, I got tired faster. By the second mile I was running on pure will power, I was not motivated to keep running. I got home and decided that if I was ever to fast again; I will not be participating in any physical exercise because it does have an effect on your body immediately. 

Now that I experimented with this mini fast, I am thinking of all those poor girls (and boys) who suffer from body dismorphia and chronically under eat and over exercise just to fit a certain image category. These individuals must have a miserable life--I felt as my personality was sucked from me in ONE day--imagine these people who under eat for a lengthy period of time. They don't realize that they are not eating enough to nurture their body properly so that they can continue to perform at or above their desired level. They don't realize that they themselves are abusing their body to the greatest degree, robbing it from the basic needs it needs to survive.  

What are your opinions about fasting? Under eating? Over exercising?
Do you think some people thrive on over exercising, that it makes them feel alive?
I feel that fasting shouldn't be done by everyone; only certain people know how to properly listen to their body and are able to do it safely. However, i think it abuses your body to participate in this practice tooo often.  

Breakfast: Oranges (4), Cuties (6), few slices of jicama Peach and pear

Lunch: less than two cups of OJ

            Papaya tacos: papaya, cucumber, bell pepper, tomatoes, scallions, cilantro, tomatoes

            Guacamole

Dinner: three baby bananas, 3-4 cups of grapes, 1 apple, 1 pear, 5 dates, and 4 dried figs 

Exercise: 11.45 miles

random soccer/volleyball playing at the shelter I volunteer for 

Earthlings

After watching this documentary it’s very hard not to be emotionally disturbed.  How low has the human race gotten that we have no sympathy towards other creatures?

Specism is a profound word used to describe how humans beings prefer their species above all else. It is an immoral way to justify the killing of innocent animals for sport, food, clothing and other selfish reasons. The fact that these animals are not simply being killed--they are being slaughtered, tortured, brutally murdered and disgraced by the human race goes to show how much we as the superior species have evolved that we do not know what it means to have mercy.

First of all, food is the main reason why animals are killed. Pigs, sheep, chicken, cows, fish, and crustations are all being housed in horrendous conditions. When going to a grocery store and selecting fresh produce such as an apple, one is keen to pick an apple that is without blemishes. However, when one buys meat they don't have that capability. These animals, of course, are housed in close quarters that disease is inevitable. Pigs are often covered with open wounds; they are constantly licking/eating the flesh off of each other, as well as living in sordid conditions. Then they are ruthlessly butchered and sold as meat. The evidence is wiped clean and one selects, "the best prime of meat that money can buy". That same piece of meat was part of the body of a disease raised creature that was unnaturally brought into the world due to human's "need" for meat. In reality, people who are picky about their food aren’t as selective or aware of what they are putting in their body because they don't know the exact condition of said animal. One who doesn't eat meat and relies solely on fresh produce can tell whether an apple has been dropped, sprayed with pesticides, coated with wax or other extraneous factors.

This film makes someone re-evaluate what they are putting in their mouth due to the ethical conditions of the animals.

I'll admit, I did not become vegan due to ethical reasons. My goal was vanity. I wanted healthy hair and skin. I also wanted to eat all I wanted without gaining weight (anyone who knows me has seen me stomach a huge amount of food). However, once you immense yourself into this lifestyle, you start to educate yourself and you do feel compelled to become a more compassionate being. In some cases, you may end up loving animals and hating humans a little. By watching the film you realize-in my case-that I ate beef, which is a cow, that was strung by its hind leg upside down and had its throat slit. In many cases, the conveyor belt took it to its slaughtering location. In many of these instances, my heart skipped a beat as I watched the cow move. The creature was still alive and was ruthlessly being treated as an object that cannot feel.

The hardest part was watching how they manufacture "kosher" meat. It’s pathetic to say that people who view an animal as something so sacred will slaughter an animal with no respect. Now it boils my blood to hear the hypocritical people who claim to only eat kosher meat because it’s more humane. There is nothing humane about the way they torment and toss the animal to their death for the sake of food.   

As for clothing, I must admit that I love leather. I feel it has a “bad-ass” look to it. I no longer with to be classified as a rebel as I rather be someone who supports the environment and isn’t so concerned with material goods. I do own a few pieces of leather, I admit, I think my Dr. Martens are some of the coolest shoes ever. I also own a very nice leather jacket my mom ordered me from Mexico. I love these items; I also feel sad every time that I now wear them because I know they how they were acquired.

Ever since turning vegan, I have not bought any animal clothing. I also do not intend to do so in the future. It’s cruel that these animals are practically skinned alive just to make a coat or shoes. Now, the thought of wearing dead skin repulses me. I find it horrid that I am wearing the FLESH of an animal whose life was forcefully taken because I wanted to fashionably cover my body. That thought alone makes me feel like a repulsive and selfish-human being.

Food intake:

Breakfast: (1/2) smoothie made with two baby bananas, 2 apples, 10 dates, 4-5 large bananas, carob powder and cocoa powder

Lunch: rest of smoothie

Dinner: 3 cups of grapes, apple, peach, nectarine, 2 dried figs , 1 large banana

Exercise: 10.09 miles
45 min basic hatha yoga

Pets

I love running; it is a very relaxing and stress reducing activity for me. It’s the only time that I can feel free and not have a care in the world. It’s a freeing activity. As I was running I passed by several houses that had dogs. Some of the houses had their animals inside, so you can hear them bark through the screen door. Other households had the animals in the front yard, contained inside by the gate. We often watch the news, infomercials, or just by word of mouth that animal cruelty is on the rise. We often think of animal cruelty in the form of farm animals, slaughter houses, or shelters. However, I was thinking that having a pet is a sugar-coated way of animal cruelty. The main difference here is that, hopefully, the animals are taken care of and are loved by their owners.

As I passed each of the homes, every single dog barked at me. Some were violent and defensive barks--it’s seemed if there was no barrier containing the dog then there is a chance that it would eat me alive. Other barks were more delicate and playful. The majority were defensive. That’s when I started to contemplate the reason that these dogs were barking. I wondered if it was just their natural instinct to bark and want to run with me. That they anticipated freedom and wanted to follow their true animalistic instinct and run and be free. Also, I pondered if the dogs that had the defensive barks felt a sense of oppression and wanted to take their anger out on anyone around them.

All these thoughts came to mind. It makes you change your opinion on the simplicity of existing. These dogs, as well as all animals experience a strong sense of stress. The stress of being confined into a society that they are not naturally part of. The stress of having limited freedom to move about as well as the stress not to be in control of their day. All this adds up and builds tension for these animals which cause them to rebel and attack or become vicious with everyone around them.  

On a side note, imagine that you were constrained into a building for your whole life. You were only allowed to eat when someone would remember to feed you. Imagine being separated from your family, not knowing or being aware that you had ancestors. Imagine only being able to go outside and walk around when someone made time to take you for a walk, even then you were not free to move as you please. You were still strained to the speed/mobility/direction that your owner decided to take you. You didn’t have the ability to decide what you wanted to eat and when you wanted to eat. If you were cold, you had to deal with it because if your owners didn't want you in the house, you had to stake it outside. If you were dirty, you better be good when they wash you up, because you may get in trouble for "misbehaving" or as I say, following your natural instinct.

As we see, animals are constraint to live unnatural lives unless if they are released into the wild. Many state the fact of overpopulation as a problem; however, the only problem is that WE are breading too many animals for the diminishing wild to sustain because the human population likes to have mascots in their life.Humans like to be in control, they normally can't control the lives of other humans so they happen to control animals--cats, dogs, fish, iguanas, hamsters, etc.

Now the question is: are pets considered animal cruelty?

Breakfast: Grapes, 4 oranges, ½ peach and 6 cuties

Lunch: ¾ avocado, lettuce leaves

                Salad made with: mango, pineapple, tomato, onion, cucumber, bell pepper, cilantro and lime

                (Shared with my mom)

Dinner: grapes, 1 banana, 1 pear, 1 apple, 4 baby bananas, 6 dates, 4 dried apricots 

Long Wedesday

There were predictions for rain today; I was pretty disappointed because I had planned a 9 mile run. Thankfully, it didn't rain and I was able to run--it was freezing though. My body is still somewhat sore from Monday, my gluts hurt like crazy and I have a yoga and strength training class today. Hopefully it isn't too painful. I am looking forward to yoga, since its basic Hatha yoga and concentrate on breathing and relaxation; it is a nice de-stressor for my days. I also need a little de-stressor because my group for school isn't pulling their weight with the project. I swear, it very annoying because this is our last semester of school and they are slacking off so much. I can't believe they can't even follow through with basic communication. It really isn't that hard, especially because they are the type of people who are always on the phone 24/7. It makes no sense that they can't respond to a simple text.

Besides my mini-rant (it’s possible that I will continue to complain about these people for the restof the semester). I was watching a documentary called Dive. It is about food waste and how America is the leading nation in waste production. It made me think, especially when it stated that Americans waste about 50% of our food supply through production, transportation, consumption, exportation, and actuallyselling the food. It is mind boggling, how we always state that we want to cure world hunger however, we can't even stop our nation's hunger problems.


There are so many people suffering from food insecurity, it may not seem obvious because food insecurity isn't just defined as not having enough food. It can mean going hungry for a period of hours (as in skipping breakfast or lunch) because you are not sure if you are going to have an enough to eat for dinner. I went to asymposium a while back; food insecurity was one of the topics. It said that if you live in a family with children and the adults skip meals to protect the children from going hungry, then they are suffering from mild insecurity.

However, if the children often skip meals because of lack of food, then that is considered dangerous or serious food insecurity. My question is when is mild and major food insecurity? No one deserves to skip a meal. In my opinion, if anyone skips a meal because there is a lack of food, they are suffering frommajor food insecurity. If you are hungry--no matter your family size, it is shame to our nation. A nation who strives themselves on caring for their citizens, yet can't make sure everyone is properly fed. It’s disturbing to know that all this food that is being wasted can't go to the mouths of the people who need it. 

The documentary discusses the fact that most of the food from supermarkets such as Trader's Joes, Whole Foods, Vons, Ralph's, etc. end up in the garbage because they are either near the expiration date or because it appealing to the eyes. Most of this food is still useful and valuable. In the documentary they will dig outcarts full of food that was still valuable to eat, if frozen it can last a while or if it was immediately prepared in mass quantities (such as in food shelters) it would not be a problem. The thing that was most provocative, was the fact that these supermarkets barricaded their trash cans because they knew that people were dumpster diving. They preferred to ensure that their garbage would get all moldy and return to a dump instead of having someone eat it for dinner. Trash, is trash, if someone throws it into the dumpster it would signal that they no longer need or want it therefore it no longer has value. However, they do get offended when people dig it out. Am I noticing a trend in society here? The wealthy try to humiliate and barricade any access to progress.

Today’s food:

Breakfast: (1/2) of smoothie made from 10 bananas, 10 dates, 3 pears

Lunch: other half of smoothie

Snack? Small pinch of raisins and 1 dried apricot smuggles from sprouts bulk section when shopping

Dinner: fruit salad made from 1 apple, 1 pear, 3? Cups of grapes and two peaches

            Left over frozen smoothie

Exercise: 9.12 mile run

            30 min strength training

            45 min of light gentle yoga

Gloomy weather Tuesday

So, I know I am a horrible blogger. I am not in the habit of keeping diaries or even writing about my life every day because it’s pretty routine. I find that I pretty much do the same thing on a weekly basis. It pretty gloomy outside, we have a chance of rain and it the sky is overcast at the moment. At first I was sad because I thought I wasn't going to be able to go out and run. However, I did thankfully. Not a long run, mind you—as I am still pretty sore, however a humble 4.78 miles was enough to get my blood pumping. I had to hurry home because it started sprinkling and I want to avoid getting sick at all cost.

I have to go to my internship site today, I kind of feel lazy because sometimes it can be very boring. But the thing I dread the most is driving there. This is what irritates me because they are suck long drives and I feel that I waste my life in my car getting from point A to point B. But, we all have to struggle some to make our life happen right?

AHHH, my feet feel like icicles right now, it so cold.

Oh, I have a major rant coming later. But FYI it’s about my group. I can’t believe that the three other girls can’t get their act together to decide how to do our project. I already did like 60% of the assignment and no one else can do anything else? I can’t believe it; they are like 22-25 years old and can’t even act mature. This is what our future employees are going to be like? It’s quiet ridiculous.  

Breakfast: nom nom.

                I had my wooden bowl (I love my wooden bowls J) full of grapes, papaya, and 3 baby
                bananas+2 dates    

               (I had to cut the brown yucky spots off)

Lunch: Leftover salad/tacos from yesterday

          2 cups Fresh squeezed OJ
          1-2 oranges and about 3 cuties 

Dinner: fruit salad with 3 nectarines, 1 apple, grapes (like 3 cups), 1 banana, and 6 dates.

Feeling stuffed.

I just got home from the internship site only to find out that my group for my project haven't finished their fair share of the work. It disgust me how people can be so irresponsible. 

Run it Baby!

First time for everything right? Well, I have always been dreaming of running, running oh so very far like my dad’s job. That 10 mile stretch doesn't seem too far, but when you consider that it is a 20 mile round trip, I bet you will be thinking otherwise. Well, today I did that 20 mile trip, plus some. I had to make a few detours due to construction so I ended up running 22.71 miles in about three hours and 38 min. I feel good. It was a huge accomplishment for me. At first, it didn't seem so bad. When I got to my dad’s work (giving him a hug and then leaving), I thought it was a piece of cake. However, a bit longer and I got thirsty so I had to buy water (I had no pockets so put a 5 dollar bill in my bra pocket) and my money was kind of soaked. I ran about two miles fanning my money so it could get dry so I wouldn't have to hand over a sweaty bill. That would have been embarrassing. However, I got my water (something so tasteless has never been sooo good before) and tried to ration it so I wouldn't get a stomachache as I still had about 8 miles to run.

My legs started to feel heavy and I thought that I wouldn't make it. I was no longer enjoying the scenery as much, I just wondered if I would make it home. The airplanes, my old neighborhood, my old home were no longer appealing as the wish to see my new home, my new neighborhood and not see planes (my dad works near our old home which is located near the airport). But I soon saw the bridge that I longed to see, miraculously my feet took off. That three mile stretch was no longer a challenged I ran my heart out until I saw the beautiful fence that surrounded my home.

Surprisingly, I wasn't as starved as I thought I would be. I did eat throughout the day but my hunger hit at night time. I was famished for dinner and ate about 10 tacos. Then two hours later I was still starving so I hit the grape container pretty hard. But I feel satisfied now, not stuffed.  Have you guys accomplished any goals lately? Today’s run was a major accomplishment, I now feel ready for the LA Marathon.

Today’s food:

BF: Medium size bowl of grapes (like 4-5 cups without the stems)

      Two nectarines

Lunch: 2.5 apples

            6 cuties

Diner: raw tacos: "salsa" pineapple, papaya, tomato, cucumbers, celery, scallions, cilantro, bell pepper

                    "guacamole"tomato, avocado, onion, cilantro and lime

                     "sauce" (same for noodles) papaya and pineapple

            Raw fiesta noodles: Cucumber and carrot noodles with sauce 

Dessert: nectarine

            Bowl of grapes (like three cups-without steams)

Exercise of the day:

Run: 22.71 miles

            Short 20 min walk with the family 

V Day

Happy Valentine’s Day everyone!

Today has actually been very hectic. I woke up and quickly washed the dishes and made my sisters a smoothie breakfast. I had to figure out what was going on with my sister (7yr old) and her school’s V-day party. Turns out, there was not a party and my mom just wanted me to go make them popcorn as a treat. So I did, I made a huge amount of popcorn, I felt like I worked at a movie theater or something. It was fun, but those second graders can be such a hassle. All 22 of them were trying to get me to serve them juice and refill their popcorn bags at the same time. It was insane. But I felt good, in the end everyone appreciated it and the teacher was thankful.

Besides that, I had to clean my house (Thursdays are the only days I truly have a chance for that), was my car, pay some bills, and then my dad asked me to take him to Bed Bath and Beyond to buy some Dr. Scholls. So, I did that. Then I got home and made dinner for everyone. I made the corn salad, and put some in romaine leaves for tacos. My family had turkey tacos and my mom had salmon tacos (she used the corn salad with some salmon in lettuce leaves).

I did, thankfully have a small chance to run in the morning. I had breakfast beforehand, which was a horrible idea since I normally run on an empty stomach so I did get some pain. I suffered through it, only pulling out about 6.78 miles. However, later in the day I did a short 15 min circuit that consisted of jumping jacks, push-ups, jumping squats, burpees, and the like. I HATE BURPEES!!! Torture, torture, tortuuuuuuuuuuure. However, my legs feel good. Overall, I had a nice day. I spent it with my family, which is something I value tremendously these days as I hardly see them due to school, work, two internships, and homework.

Hope everyone enjoyed their day.

Today's eats:

Breakfast :

12 dates

1 apples

2 bananas

Snack: 1 orange

            7 or so cuties

Lunch: banana (5 or 6) and dates (12 or so) ice cream

Snacks: various cuties

Dinner: Corn salad:

Corn, papaya, mango, tomato, onion, cilantro, scallions, avocado, lime, lettuce, celery, cucumber and bell pepper

2 cups of orange juice

Dessert: 2 oranges

            3 apples

            Handful of raisins

Yesterday's food 

 Breakfast:

Half smoothie from yesterday

Banana

Lunch:

1 quart of OJ

1 apple

pear

1.5 c strawberries

Snack: 7cuties + pear

Dinner: 2 pears

            Apple

            4 oranges

Dessert: 2 small boxes of raisins 

Typical Tuesday

Before and after my run today:

Oranges=7

Tangerines 5

Mango=1

Lunch:

Salad with 1 head of romaine, cucumber noodles, 1.5 tomatoes, ½ a Mexican papaya, line, onion, 1 bell pepper, 2 cups of orange juice and 1 avocado

Snack: Homemade trail mix made from almond (like 5), raisins and dried bananas

Dinner: 1 banana+1 apple+10-15? Dates

                ½ smoothie made from 7 bananas, 10 dates, 2 pears, 1.5 cups of almond milk

                1 small box of raisins

                Handful of dried apricots

Today I ran 10.75 miles

Today wasn't the best day ever. I am having lots of problems with my group from school who I have a huge group project due at the end of the semester. It’s ridiculous. I don’t know why they can’t grow up and do their work and pay attention. Other than that, it hasn't been that bad. I went to my internship site and we played soccer and twister. It was something else; I haven’t played those two games in a while. Now I want to take my sisters to the park so that we can play soccer, I haven’t done that with them in forever. It will be nice, just to have a stress free day relaxing and enjoying the sun. 

Accountability

Okay, so I am trying to control my fat intake and will be posting what I am eating so that I can be held accountable.

BF: banana (2) + half of lunch smoothie

Lunch: smoothie made of 5 bananas, 10 dates, three pears, and almond milk

                Pear

Dinner: leftover spinach smoothie (2 cups) from yesterday

10 dates, banana, pear (2) and apple+ 2 mini boxes of raisins

Exercise: 10.43 mile run, 45 min of light Hatha yoga, and about 20-30 min of strength training.

I'll elaborate on my day tomorrow, I hardly got any sleep last night and am quiet tired. 

Sweet dreams 

Bad Premonition

There have been countless amounts of times that I walk into a room and I feel like everything is going to go bad at the moment. I hate the feeling of dreaded anticipation. It is horrible, you know that something wrong is going to happen but you don't know when. All you can literally do is wait. It brings you on the edge of your seat and you tend to break yourself in a cold sweat that you make yourself very nervous so that when what every the "bad" thing occurs you panic and don't know how to react. Today I went to a meeting for my internship site and I knew I was going to get in trouble once I saw the agenda that was planned out. I read on there, "entrance and training policy".  
       Before I elaborate, I must tell you what happened. A while ago, I received an email from my internship site telling me that there was going to be training for data entry. It also stated that if there was anyone else that was interested to feel free to forward the email to them. So that’s what I did, I forward the message to my friend who also was trying to get into the internship with the same program. Then, when my friend had an interview, she didn't get the spot on the internship site. Therefore, training for her would have been pointless. Unfortunately, she kept emailing the person who was going to do the training as well as the professor who was sponsoring the internship. Long story short--It ended badly. I TOLD her not to go to training because it was meant specifically for the internship, not general data entry. However, she didn't listen.

Now, back to the story. 

After my friend told me what was going on, I somewhat knew that I was going to get in trouble. Well, the program coordinator and the program director both decided to talk about "inviting" others into the group and violating the HIPPA and other Safety laws that they needed to abide by. The program director kept looking at me during the meeting. It was excruciating, I didn't say anything but I knew that she was talking about me the whole time. I could have died, I wanted to hurt my friend because I told her not to go because she was going to feel stupid and it wasn't going to benefit her. I didn't want to be there, I joined this internship for the sake of learning. And believe me; I am learning that program directors rather embarrass you anonymously in front of the whole committee instead of talking to you privately about the program.
There have been other instances that I have felt like this that I may elaborate in the future about but I had to get this one off my chest now.

Happy day to all......

Lent

As a practicing catholic, we celebrate Lent every year. It is a time where we abstain from and item or habit in order to show sacrifice for a full forty days. This is done in remembrance of the time when Jesus was in the desert deep in meditation and went forty days without food or water. This is supposed to teach us to liberate ourselves from our worldly possessions and to be purified of any negativity in our lives.

Mostly during this period, people tend to give up food such as: chocolate, ice cream, fast food, chips, soda, and beer. Since I follow a low fat diet, I tend to not consume these things. However, I was looking back at the items that I do consume and realized that even though I tend to keep a low fat diet, my fat intake can range from 10-15% on a daily basis. Realistically, this is not where I would want it. I know what my problem is; I love pistachios and peanuts way too much. They are my preferred snack food when I am sitting in front of the television on Friday night with my family or if I am feeling a bit peckish in front of the computer.

I am hoping that going forty days without nuts or seeds will teach me a lesson in self-control. I hope that I will be able to free myself from attachment to these items because when I eat them, I do tend to overeat and it seems like my body has a mind of its own.

Also, I do hope that I blog or at the least post my intake at least 5 days a week through the duration of lent. I want to get in the habit of posting my feeling and try to be active in social media that doesn't relate to social networking such as Facebook.

Why Fruitarian?

When analyzing my past lifestyle, I realized that this has been my chosen path. After trying to lose weight I started to struggle with food physically, mentally, and emotionally, I was eating a typical SAD diet at the time. I was calorie-restricting and I was miserable. Then after deciding I needed to gain weight I started eating more; however I was still sticking to my own preset calorie target. I was gaining weight, energy, health and strength. However, I was still unhappy. My life was dominated by numbers and I had developed a disgusting OCD with my food that made me panic when some food-related event occurred out of nowhere. I could no longer be “free” like I used to be when I was younger. My life was degrading due to my anxiety stricken state.

In my quest for health and a change to alleviate myself of my anxiety that was starting to affect other aspects of my life I researched vegetarianism and veganism. I decided to try it. I soon found a HCRV (high carb raw vegan) lifestyle and everything changed for me. It is the first time that I stopped counting; I no longer felt the need to restrict to a certain number. I also noticed my mood changed, not dramatically, but I have started to be nicer to my siblings and tried to be more patient with the people around me. However, it’s a slow process.

My new re-found health is what has changed me and has given me the energy to continue on with this lifestyle. I feel healthier, I no longer need my reading glasses, nor do I experience horrible headaches and most importantly I am becoming comfortable in my own skin. The most liberating aspect is that I no longer count my calories or get anxious when someone offers me food. I do watch my fat intake—which I think everyone should—however I no longer STRESS about my food. I live in a completely natural state.

To me, that is the importance, trying to minimize all the negatives in your life and become one with your environment. Yes, I know it sounds like something a hippy would say. However, if you can’t go out and enjoy your surroundings, then there is no point of living because you have to like what’s around you and if you think that spending your entire life behind a computer and “liking” pictures on Facebook or following celebrities whose lifestyle you are never going to achieve on twitter is enjoyable. Then my friend, you have not experience natural bliss!