Two days to go!

Happy, happy, joy, joy!

This is what I imagine everyone feeling because it is such a lovely day outside today. However, I am filled with nerves and anxiety. The LA Marathon is two days away! At this point in time I actually regret signing up for it. If you think about 26.2 miles is a long distance, then more than people travel to work in a single day! I know this would be a major accomplishment for me, I know I will love saying that I completed it. However, I am super nervous.

One of the main reasons why I am a bundle of nerves is because my hip has not healed completely. I realized that last Wednesday, I did hill work and went on the adductor and abductor machines, I did happen to increase the weight a little. Perhaps, I wasn't ready for a weight increase, therefore my hip joint must have popped or overstretch, or something. Well, the point is that it still has not healed and I worry that it is going to have an effect on my running tomorrow. I really hope that I can finish the race. At first my goal was to run it in under 4 hrs. and 30 min, how I hope that I can complete it in about 5 hours at the LEAST.
I am feeling a bit apprehensive; I haven't run this whole week due to health reasons. So to take five day break and then dash for the race is kind of daunting. I hope that my parents will make it in time to watch me finish. I would love that tremendously. I have been dreaming of this day for about a whole year. My legs are getting a bit shaky as I say this, but I want to be a runner. I want to wake up and feel the urge, the necessity to run in my life. I somewhat already experience this, as I was not able to sleep a wink last night. I went to bed, trying to get well rested after a hectic week of school, and I couldn't fall asleep. I did so many things to try to fall asleep. I even got out of bed and went to the playroom and hoped I would fall asleep in there (it has worked in the past) but I didn't. My mommy says it might be nerves or stress, as to my group hasn’t been cooperative. Either way, I got two hours of sleep that night and surprisingly I was not fatigued throughout the day.  

Other than that, life has been somewhat chaotic. My little sister has a hairline fracture on her foot (completely my fault). She was on the grill of my cruiser bike, and her foot got caught up in the wheel. It’s my entire fault because I was the one who told her to hop on and now my beautiful 4 year old baby sister is going to be scarred for the rest of her life. It’s going to hurt every time I see her foot, it’s completely destroyed and it’s my entire fault. My mom says to be thankful that nothing else happened. Truthfully, I am, I thought that I killed her or something more severe had happened. When we were riding the bike, she started screaming and I looked down and one of her shoes was on the floor. I quickly stopped and rushed her to the corner were I examined the damaged and was horrified at the sight of her bleeding foot. I imagined that her foot was chopped off or something else happened. The good thing is that her skin--about four inches--was scrapped off, nothing serious happened. But I will always be mad at myself for letting that happen to her. She is my sister, I am supposed to care and protect her, yet I injured her in a way.

The good thing is that she is healing, being bossy while at it. She starts to demand things. But I get a sense of joy when I find her on my bed playing. It makes me feel as if she still loves me. That

gives me the most joy in life. In a way, I want to dedicate the marathon to her. She inspires me to try hard despite my messed up hip. She remains a happy bubble little kid who has not let the cast get in the way of her life. She will always be my remarkable younger sister. I love the curly haired little monkey!